Greetings from Vancouver

Greetings from Vancouver!!!!

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It’s been a wild month. From the long LDW in Vermont with my friends, to a girls trip to Lake Placid, a birthday celebration in the vineyards in the North Fork, and now here across the continent in Vancouver for SeaWheeze. This month has been non stop and I am so grateful for each and every opportunity (however exhausting it is at times).

I’m going to be posting as much as I can over the weekend to share the experience with everyone – while also staying present in the moment. I figured I would kick off the weekend by sharing some pictures from my run around the sea wall yesterday to some first observations since taking off from LGA.

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My First Impressions of Vancouver

1.Everyone seems really happy. No one is yelling at their cellphones, taming their crazy child, or beeping their horn because the light turned green .1 seconds ago.

2. Speaking of cellphones – I have seen almost zero people walking while looking at their phones – which is currently the #1 hazard in NYC. I wonder if this will change once all the runners arrive!

3. This weather is fall – and no one is prepared. I went for a run yesterday in a tank and capris and stopped by lululemon/Sephora at the end. Multiple people both in the stores and on the streets were concerned by my lack of clothing and shared their concerns with me. I went out at night in a sweatshirt and everyone had scarves and hats. Now don’t get me wrong – I am underprepared thanks to NYC being 95* the past couple months – but I don’t think it’s wintertime either.

4. The exchange rate is making me want buy all of the lululemon items – but I’m trying to resist due to that big W word happening next July. Whenever I get the urge – I’ll open my wedding spreadsheet as a reminder.

5. These people have it all. Mountains, beaches, city lights – watch out Al – I may have fallen in love 🙂

Keep an eye out for more to come!

It wasn’t you…it was me.

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Hello B&B family – Pam here!

This is an odd note to write – I didn’t know this would happen. As you may have noticed – I haven’t been around since late spring. It was never my intention to take a break but it’s something I had to do. It’s funny because I pride Louise and myself on making it for two years – I know plenty of blogs that started and never made it past three months. But I reached a point where I was forcing myself to write, I wasn’t connecting with the posts, and I wasn’t enjoying it. It was in conjunction with the heat of wedding planning, the opportunity for a promotion at work, and a time of growth in my relationship. To be completely transparent – I should have been more open with Louise with what was going on. I can never thank her enough for holding the fort together while I sorted my way through life challenges. There was a reason we ended up on this journey together. It’s so easy to make it look like you have things together online – but it’s what is happening behind that scenes that really defines a person.

I don’t want you to think it didn’t weigh on me – it definitely did. I apologized to Louise continuously but I just didn’t have it in me. I was up until the wee hours while giving presentations on the importance of sleep. I was skipping workouts while speaking to others about the importance of finding a routine. I realized I had put myself last and I had to shift.

So it’s funny – I’ve been leading up to my 30thbirthday and not sure how I felt. I was both excited and sad. I know it’s not a big deal – but for me it was this weird transition period. My early 20s were not easy – actually I would say they were the ones that built the woman I am today. I’ve been pretty open on here about my struggles – my abusive ex, my drug use, and the skeletons from my childhood. It has taken a lot of hard work and introspection but I have worked hard to shift the dialogue in my head to appreciate the past – but focus on the future.

I am so freaking excited for what is to come. As I continue to grow personally and professionally – I’m so happy to share it with all of you. I AM BACK. I needed a little time, a little reflection, a little work but I am ready. Louise and I spent the weekend together and we have spent the time to enjoy each other and also plan for our future.

So this is my apology letter to all of you – and asking you to have me back. I cannot wait for all the adventures that are to come in 2018 and 2019.  Thank you for supporting us through the good times – and those that are a little harder.

Xo, Pam